I’d always liked a drink, and sometimes more than most. During my recovery from my difficult birth, and subsequent miscarriage, I found alcohol a way to help me sleep, help me socialise and forget about the trauma. I also wanted to forget about my police career, the loss of which I still grapple with to this day - I still can‘t watch any reality police programmes (and not because they seem to do everything wrong!), because it‘s simply too painful.
I realised I had a problem when I started secretly drinking before meeting friends at a local cinema to watch a film, not an event which anyone would ever associate with having an alcoholic drink. I tried to give up, and managed to do so for 5 weeks until I fell off the wagon spectacularly, drinking myself into a stupor on a random Thursday night at home. I woke up at 3am on the sofa, still drunk and ashamed. It was one event too many. One hangover too many. I had had enough. I had managed to get control back over my life in so many ways, but this was defeating me time and again.
Eight years previously I had successfully given up smoking, pretty much overnight, with the help of Allen Carr (NOT the comedian!) who has a brilliant Easy Way programme. I read his book and have never had any urge to smoke since. I bought his book, read it....and have never looked back. I finished the book on 1st September 2018, and have never had a drink since. I genuinely haven‘t missed it, as his approach is to take away the desire to drink in the first place. I truly don’t want a drink at all. I don’t have to use any will power, I simply don’t want an alcoholic drink. I have enjoyed birthdays, Christmases, celebrations, commiserations (global virus pandemics included), and it is the best thing I have ever done for myself. I feel so much better, no more hangxiety about what I might have said and done.
Alcohol - I got you beat HAH.